by Molly Pierce | Nov 20, 2025 | Anxiety Related, Confidence, Relationships
If you’re a parent in Leawood, Overland Park, or the greater Kansas City area, you’ve probably noticed your teen feeling more overwhelmed than ever. School pressure, social media, college prep, and the lingering effects of the pandemic have turned normal stress into daily anxiety for many adolescents.
The good news? You don’t have to fix it alone—and your teen doesn’t have to “just push through.” Two evidence-based therapies, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), are especially powerful for teens, and parents play a crucial supporting role in the process.
How CBT Helps Teens Rewire Anxious Thoughts CBT teaches teens to spot the automatic negative thoughts that fuel anxiety (“Everyone will laugh if I speak up in class” or “I’m going to fail this test and ruin my future”). Together with a therapist, they learn to challenge those thoughts with evidence and replace them with more balanced ones. Over just a few months, many Leawood-area teens notice they feel less paralyzed by worry and more capable of handling tests, friendships, and uncertainty.
How ACT Helps Teens Live Bigger Than Anxiety While CBT focuses on changing thoughts, ACT focuses on changing the relationship with thoughts and feelings. Teens learn mindfulness skills to notice anxiety without getting hooked by it, then clarify what truly matters to them—their values (being a supportive friend, pursuing music, standing up for what’s right)—and take small, brave steps in those directions even when anxiety shows up. The result? A life that feels meaningful instead of fear-driven.
Your Role as a Parent: Connection Over Correction Research shows teens do best when parents shift from “fix-it” mode to “coach-and-connect” mode. Simple, powerful actions include:
- Validating feelings without jumping to solutions (“That sounds really heavy. I’m here.”)
- Modeling healthy coping (your own deep breaths or short walks)
- Encouraging small value-based actions instead of avoidance
- Attending a few joint sessions so you understand the tools your teen is learning
At True Self Counseling in Leawood, we specialize in blending CBT and ACT for adolescents while actively involving parents when it’s helpful. Many families tell us the biggest relief is finally having a shared language and practical strategies that work both in sessions and at home.
If your teen is withdrawing, irritable, or struggling to sleep because of stress and anxiety, you don’t have to wait for it to “get bad enough.” Early support makes a huge difference.
We offer both in-person sessions in Leawood and virtual options for busy Kansas City-area families. Your teen deserves to feel capable and connected—and you deserve to feel like a confident, supported parent again.
Ready to get started? Call or message us—we can’t wait to help your family thrive. Schedule you first session today!
by Molly Pierce | Dec 19, 2023 | Confidence, Depression, Life Style, Relationships, Self Image
Depression is a mental health condition that goes beyond mere feelings of sadness. It would be better described as a persistent and overwhelming sense of despair that can linger for weeks, months, and even years. Depression affects millions of people worldwide, oftentimes having a negative impact on personal well-being, relationships, work, school, and overall quality of life.
Contrary to common misconceptions, depression isn’t a sign of weakness, nor is it a mere mood swing that one can easily snap out of. Rather, depression involves a combination of biological, psychological, and/or environmental factors. Physiologically, there can be multiple neurotransmitters involved, making it difficult to regulate mood. Genetic predispositions can also make certain individuals more susceptible to experiencing depressed mood. Additionally, life events such as trauma, loss, or chronic stress can act as triggers, exacerbating the condition.
Being able to recognize the symptoms of depression is essential, not only for those who experience it, but also for those close to them. Detecting depression at its earliest signs is optimal, as it allows for prompt initiation of treatment, which can prevent the condition from worsening. Common symptoms include persistent sadness, loss of interest in previously enjoyable activities, changes in sleep and appetite, fatigue, and difficulty concentrating.
The DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition) outlines the following criterion for depression (otherwise known as major depressive disorder or MDD). In order to meet diagnostic criteria, an individual must exhibit at least five of the following symptoms during the same 2-week period, representing a change from previous functioning. Additionally, at least one of the symptoms must be either (1) depressed mood, or (2) loss of interest or pleasure.
- Depressed mood most of the day
- Significantly decreased interest or pleasure in all (or almost all) activities
- Major change in weight or appetite (not due to dieting)
- Insomnia or hypersomnia
- Excessive restlessness or observable reduction in activity levels
- Fatigue (exhaustion) or loss of energy
- Feelings of worthlessness or excessive/inappropriate guilt
- Diminished ability to think, concentrate, or make decisions
- Frequent thoughts of death or attempt to end one’s life
These symptoms must cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning. It’s important to note that the diagnosis also considers ruling out other medical conditions or substances that could contribute to the symptoms. Diagnosis and treatment should be conducted by qualified mental health professionals.
Seeking professional help, whether through therapy, medication, or a combination of both, is a crucial step for managing depression. It is certainly not a sign of weakness, but a courageous step towards healing. By fostering awareness, understanding, and compassion, we can collectively promote mental health treatment for those in need of support. The best thing we can do for those affected by depression is (1) listen without judgment, (2) validate their experiences and emotions, (3) connect them with a professional, and (4) continue to connect with them throughout their journey toward a brighter future.
by Molly Pierce | Nov 11, 2023 | Balance, Depression, Life Style, Relationships
As the seasons change and holidays approach, managing mental health becomes crucial. For many, these transitions can bring a mix of emotions, including excitement, stress, sadness, and more. Here are some strategies to navigate the potential impact on mental well-being during these times:
Acknowledge and Validate Emotions
Recognize that it’s normal to experience a range of emotions during seasonal changes and holidays. Whether it’s the joy of festivities or the pressure of expectations, validating your feelings is the first step in managing them.
Maintain Consistent Routines
Stick to regular routines as much as possible. Consistency in daily habits, such as sleep patterns, exercise, and meals, can provide a sense of stability during periods of change.
Set Realistic Expectations
Be realistic about what you can accomplish and what you expect from yourself and others during the holidays. Avoid overcommitting and focus on what brings genuine joy rather than succumbing to societal pressures.
Connect with Others
Loneliness and isolation can exacerbate low mood and negative outlook. Prioritize connection with loved ones, whether it be planning a fun activity together, catching up on a phone or video call, or just a quick meet-up for coffee. Be intentional about engaging in activities that help you feel a sense of community and support.
Mindful Practices
Mindfulness is a simple and effective practice for managing stress and promoting overall emotional well-being. It can be as simple as pausing for a moment to enjoy, soak in, and appreciate a nice experience. Choosing times to set your phone aside may help facilitate this, as it helps to minimize distractions that take you away from the present moment. Practicing gratitude (such as writing down an appreciation from the day), meditation (headspace is a great resource to facilitate the process), or yoga can help you stay connected to yourself and the here-and-now.
Manage Seasonal Mood Changes
Seasonal changes, particularly during fall and winter, can trigger changes in mood, from feeling tired and unmotivated, to feeling depressed and hopeless. For milder cases, exposure to natural light and engagement in outdoor activities can help reduce symptoms. If seasonal mood changes last more than one week, consider contacting a mental health professional to help you navigate to a better headspace.
Given the uniqueness of each individual, it’s important to recognize that various forms of self-care and coping strategies may work better for different people. By taking a proactive and mindful approach, you can successfully navigate the challenges of seasonal changes and holiday pressures, while maintaining balance and preserving well-being.
by Molly Pierce | Sep 1, 2016 | Anxiety Related, Balance, Counseling Theory, Depression
The goal of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is to create a rich, full, and meaningful life while accepting the pain that inevitably goes with it. This is done by changing one’s relationship to their symptoms in order to live a more value-driven life. Further, the goal is to accept what is outsideof one’s control, and commit to taking action to enrich one’s life. It can be summed up in one basic premise: pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.
Oftentimes, trying to get rid of symptoms actually results in being more bothered by the symptoms. For example, try to not picture a pink elephant in your mind’s eye. What happened? You saw a pink elephant. This is just what happens when we try NOT to focus on any particular thing!
Being too focused on symptoms impacts our ability to life a value-driven life. We’re too busy and using all our energy on “symptom-reduction” rather than choosing to focus on what is meaningful in our lives, such as family, friends, relationships, advancing career, rest, self-care, and so forth. When we instead focus on our values, our symptoms can drift to the background, rather than take center stage.
ACT asserts that problems are essentially caused by two things: cognitive fusion and experiential avoidance. Cognitive fusion is when we become inseparable from our thoughts, and then our thoughts dominate our behavior. Experiential avoidance happens when we attempt to avoid, get rid of, suppress, or escape unwanted experiences (thoughts, feelings, memories, sensations, etc.).
Trying too hard to control how we feel simply gets in the way of a rich, full life. We can’t do important, value-driven things if we are always trying to get rid of symptoms. Control is the problem, not the solution.
What can we do about this? Practice defusion to get stuck from our thoughts and gain distance from them. Defusion is taking a step back and seeing our thoughts for what they are: nothing more or less than words and pictures. As I like to say, look AT your thoughts, rather than FROM your thoughts.
Here are some ways you can attempt to defuse from your thoughts:
- Say “I’m having the thought that…”
- Use a silly voice to say the thought
- Sing the thought like a song
- Repeat the thought nonstop for 30 seconds until it sounds like gibberish
Another way to defuse from unhelpful thoughts is to practice mindfulness. What is mindfulness? Mindfulness means paying attention with flexibility, openness, and curiosity. It allows you to be aware of your experience in the moment as opposed to being “caught up” in your thoughts. Mindfulness involves an attitude of openness; being curious about your experience rather than fighting with it. This is helpful because often times the more we try to fight the way we feel, the more we end up feeling it.
The goal of ACT is referred to as psychological flexibility, which entails being present, opening up, and doing what matters. An important facet of psychological flexibility is acceptance: allowing thoughts and feelings to be present, regardless of whether they are pleasant or painful.
The fun part of ACT (in my humble opinion) is valued living: doing what we want to be doing with our lives. What’s important to us? What do we want to stand for? How do we want to behave and act on a daily basis? Our values are our compass; they guide our decisions and behavior. A good way to figure out what your values are is to imagine your retirement party or funeral — Who would you want to speak about your life and what would you want to hear them say?
Once you have figured out what your values are, then final step is to take committed action (effective action motivated by your values). One helpful way to do this are to make a public commitment; tell someone about it. This will create some level of accountability for you. Another thing you can do is create an action plan worksheet. Last, but not least, simply take the first, tiniest step. The first step is often the hardest, but if you can manage to get started, the rest will follow.
For more on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, click here and here!
by Molly Pierce | Mar 16, 2016 | Anxiety Related, Balance, Counseling Theory, Depression, Relationships
Albert Ellis is known as the grandfather of Cognitive Behavior Therapy. He combined humanistic, philosophical, and behavioral therapy to form Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) in 1955. A main assumption of REBT is that people contribute to their psychological problems by the way they interpret events. Further, our emotions stem mainly from our beliefs, evaluations, interpretations, and reactions to life situations. REBT assumes that cognitions (thoughts), emotions, and behaviors interact significantly and have a reciprocal cause-and-effect relationship. Additionally, REBT postulates that people are born with a potential for both rational and irrational thinking.
According to Ellis, we have an inborn tendency toward growth and actualization, yet we often sabotage our movement toward growth due to self-defeating patterns we have learned. We originally learn irrational beliefs from significant others during childhood, and we actively reinforce these self-defeating beliefs by repetition, and by behaving as if they are useful. But it is not useful to blame ourselves and others; instead, it is important that we learn how to accept ourselves despite our imperfections. Therefore, a major goal of REBT is to achieve unconditional self-acceptance and unconditional other acceptance; the more one is able to accept him or herself, the more likely he is to accept others.
The therapeutic process involves identifying irrational beliefs, and replacing such beliefs with more rational and effective ways of thinking. Changing one’s thinking results in changing one’s emotional reactions to situations. Ellis succinctly puts it this way, “You mainly feel the way you think.” Some examples of irrational beliefs that lead to self-defeat include: I must have the approval of all the people in my life, or else I am worthless. I must perform all tasks perfectly, or else I am a failure. It is better to avoid life’s difficulties than to try and end up looking foolish.
The A-B-C framework and method of disputing irrational beliefs is central to REBT theory and practice.
A = an event, behavior, or attitude
B = belief about the event
C = emotional & behavioral consequence or reaction (can be healthy or unhealthy)
D = disputing irrational or self-defeating beliefs
E = effective philosophy of replacing unhealthy thoughts with healthy ones
F = a new set of healthy feelings
A (the activating event) does not cause C (the emotional consequence); rather, B (the person’s belief about the event) largely causes C. D is the application of methods to challenge irrational beliefs by detecting, debating, and discriminating irrational (self-defeating) beliefs from rational (self-helping) beliefs. E is the new and effective belief system that consists of replacing unhealthy thoughts with healthy ones. In doing this, F (a new set of healthy feelings) is created.
In summary, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy entails the following steps: (1) acknowledge that we are largely responsible for our own emotional problems, (2) accept that we have the ability to change these disturbances significantly, (3) recognize that our emotional problems often stem from irrational beliefs, (4) accurately perceive these beliefs, (5) see the value of disputing such self-defeating beliefs, (6) accept that we need to counteract our dysfunctional beliefs/feelings/behaviors, and (7) practice these methods to improve current and future circumstances.
References:
Corey, Gerald. Theory and Practice of Counseling and Psychotherapy. Belmont. Thomas Learning, Inc. 2005.
